I have wanted to write to you for a very long time. Writing letters to my child has been an idea in my head since the idea of ever having a child at all. Writing you letters to document your many firsts as you grow from an infant to toddler, to give you the advice of a mother as you navigate your teenage years, to communicate with you even when you may not want to listen to me in person. Writing you letters that one day would be given to you to look back to and know your mother's heart.
I'm still not sure if it's a great idea to start yet. I have been putting it off for a couple of years. Waiting for the right time to begin. You see...you haven't even been conceived yet. And I feel like putting these letters out here before then could haunt me later...should you never arrive. But I finally decided that maybe writing to you could be therapeutic. And that, God willing, you would be able to see one day how much you are wanted and loved..even before you existed. I guess I should explain...
I have been trying to conceive for almost 2 years. For 2 years, your dad and I have anxiously awaited the news that you were in my belly and have prayed desperately for you. It's a scary thought to think that I could never see your face, to know who you are. But I will continue trusting in God and His timing. Sometimes I am impatient, sometimes I cry and wonder why...but I know that He has a greater plan than I could understand and that He hears my prayers.
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
Jeremiah 29:11
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Romans 8:28
Prayerfully waiting,
Mom
